OPPOSITE DAY: EXTREME BIZARRO HORROR by Kevin Sweeney

Nobody remembers the Opposite Day massacre at the Big Top amusement park…Nobody EVER remembers the massacre because nobody ever SURVIVES it..

Harper thinks she is having a bad day. Having lost a great job, her home, and her girlfriend, she now works at the Big Top amusement park, entertaining guests… if “entertaining” means being sexually assaulted by the drugged up perverts who invade the park at twilight.

But Harper doesn’t know what a bad day is, not yet… because Harper doesn’t know that today is the anniversary of the worst massacre in human history… today is Opposite Day, when fun becomes terror, laughter becomes screaming, and the whole world is turned upside down in an orgy of skull-fucking, stomach-bursting, genital-grinding ultra-violence.

VITAL FLUID by Tom Bradley

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When is the world going to wake up to the genius of Tom Bradley? …one of the most criminally underrated authors on the planet.
Andrew Gallix, 3:am Magazine

When Philip K. Dick found himself suddenly transported to New Testament Syria, he must have run into his namesake, Philip the Deacon. VITAL FLUID reverses the time flow, and brings the first Philip to the twenty-first century, along with his transmigrationally entangled nemesis, Simon Magus.VITAL FLUID is inspired by the uncanny performances and fascinating life of John-Ivan Palmer, the top stage hypnotist in America today. He calls this book “a masterpiece.”

A CLOCKWORK AUBERGINE by Kevin Sweeney

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“Imagine, as part of his act, a stand-up comedian sets fire to himself and the club in which he’s performing to a sold-out crowd. Then imagine the crowd—instead of running for their lives—laughing wildly and applauding furiously as they all go up in flames. A Clockwork Aubergine is something like the literary equivalent of that.” Douglas Hackle, author of CLOWN TEAR JUNKIES and THE HOTTEST GAY MAN EVER KILLED IN A SHARK ATTACK

An absurdist anti-novel. A story for the ages, a secret-menu, a shibboleth, obscene haiku fingerprinted in greasepaint and monkey brains, a gonzo mash-up of genres ranging from Wild Western Wuxia to Soviet-Splattersteampunk-Realism, where foes become friends, friends become hovercraft, and someone keeps drunk dialling to satisfy their curiosity about snowmen. What is the Birthday Monster? Should we be buried wearing sunglasses, just to mess with future archaeologists? Is it a whale or a cheerleader? All of these questions and two more will be answered in, A CLOCKWORK AUBERGINE.

 

EXEUNT ALICE by Kevin Sweeney

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REVISED & RE-RELEASED…

A third adventure for the dream-child… ALICE’S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND and its sequel THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS are two classics of children’s literature following the nonsensical travels of the eponymous heroine, filled with scenes and characters that have become iconic and loved for generations. EXEUNT ALICE is a third tale for Lewis Carroll’s dream-child, imagining that at the end of his life he left an unpublished and final part of an “Alice” trilogy, a short and unedited first draft, presented here with footnotes and an analysis that, in keeping with the conceit, treat the story as a genuine “lost” manuscript.

A meta-fiction, a meditation, and an affectionate homage.

JAMES & THE GIANT PULSATING MASS OF PISSING, SHITTING, SCREAMING, PUKING, BURPING, BLEEDING, FARTING, SWEATING, EJACULATING, GENETICALLY MODIFIED MUTANT MONSTER MEAT by Kevin Sweeney

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Imagine JAME & THE GIANT PEACH, only instead of a giant peach it’s a genetic abomination, an unholy hulk of agonized flesh that Should Not Be… …and instead of a small boy sharing a jolly adventure with a group of anthropomorphic insects, there is a mindless killing machine on a nightmare voyage through an ecological Hell with a group of horrifying freaks! Torture in the name of science! A plastic island inhabited by mutant Sea Monkeys! Pollution kaiju! It’s another retelling of a beloved children’s classic sure to have the original author spinning in his grave!

SKIDSTAIN HALO by Kevin Sweeney

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There are many Heavens, one for every taste, and they are all paradise.

But there is one problem with eternal bliss.

Eternal bliss is B-O-R-I-N-G.

Mankind craves violence, action, competition, and the glory of being able to stomp on other’s dreams with a cry of, “Suck my eight-foot, rainbow spunking cock!”

To stop the afterlife tearing itself apart in riots born of boredom, a sport was invented. A sport that would satisfy mankind’s desire for ultraviolence and the need to hate each other’s guts for stupid reasons.

A simple story about a serial killer’s rise to super stardom.

MACHINE & THE MIND CANDY FACTORY by Kevin Sweeney

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It’s CHARLIE & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, but instead of fantastical confectionary, obnoxious brats, and a whimsically eccentric factory owner, there are brain raping narcotics, gonzo junkies, and a sociopathic CEO spokesclown who rules the world!

A bizarro remix of a beloved children’s classic, MACHINE & THE MIND CANDY FACTORY is an over-the-top, pull-out-all-the-stops, stomach-churning, mind-bending freak out for all the family!

Well… maybe not the kids…

DOOM SAYER by Zachary T. Owen

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From the author of BURN DOWN THE HOUSE AND EVERYONE IN IT. Four best friends find their reunion ruined by a gang of men in hideous baby masks. An orphan is imprisoned in a room full of bloodthirsty, childless mothers. A mutant tangles with a famous artist over a magical box. Man and anus face off against each other in a darkly humorous game of cat and mouse. These horrific tales and others make up DOOM SAYER, another collection of dark fiction from Zachary T. Owen.

“These stories will shatter you, stick with you, and lay eggs under your skin, and you’ll love it.” Gabino Iglesias, author of ZERO SAINTS

“His cerebral brand of horror fiction offers its audiences genuinely terrifying moments that have little to do with the gimmicky horror you’re being sold by mainstream media today.” Benoit Lelievre, DEAD END FOLLIES

“These stories touch on just about any angle of fear that you may have.” Dawn Mivshek, MODERN HORRORS

SATAN’S LITTLE HELPER by Kevin Sweeney

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Stuffed full of Xmas magic and stomach churning ultra-violence, it’s THE HUNGER GAMES garroted with fairy lights and force fed to THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS! The devil only wants to be adored, and thinks that remaking himself as “Satan Claus” will win the hearts of the world’s children. From dictator of Hell to beloved myth of childhood, it’s certainly an ambitious career change. He totally fucks it up. Trying to set things right, he invites children from every country in the world to the North Pole to take part in a contest, a scavenger hunt, with the winners becoming his little helpers on Xmas Eve. With Adolf the Red-Nosed Reichdeer and his army of dwarf Elvis Presley clones helping, it’s bound to be a success… Except for one problem. All the kids are armed to the teeth. And all the kids want to kill him.

EXQUISITE CORPSE ORGY by Kevin Sweeney

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From the author of DAMNATION 101 and THE WHOREHOUSE THAT JACK BUILT COMES a bizarro novel about insane evolution, in four parts.
Victorian robots wager on death-matches between mutant children… on the island of super villain Dr Tomorrow, furry morons are put on trial for their lives… glory holes are not the only source of bathroom love… and in the future, monsters wage holy war over the last resource on Earth; frozen celebrities.